Posts tagged words
Posts tagged words
From Missing Kissinger by Etgar Keret
All of my ideas, inspiration, thoughts, fears, and memories from the last ten years
I kind of really want this to make an appearance in my house
Ok so i know some people wont understand this but i woke up today and for the first time in a long time i looked in the mirror and was happy with what i saw. I have struggled with acne for years. Normally i look at myself and cannot see past the red bumps, blemishes and scars. More often than not i am afraid of what people think when they see my face. Although i have been told (by my far too kind boyfriend) that people don’t even see it, they still see me. But I can’t see beauty because of the marks. I can’t look past the ugly reminder of teenage years. But today was different. I have been working on my skin for a long time now but really noticed a change this morning. When i was getting ready for work i actually felt beautiful. I looked in the mirror and saw that i have a great smile, nice eyes, and some pretty awesome hair (if i do say so myself) None of this in a conceited way, just like i was seeing myself for the first time. I guess i kinda was. I just wanted to share my story a little bit and hopefully someone else who struffles with acne will read this and realize that one day you will be comfortable with yourself too. It took a long time coming but i feel more confident than i have since before i started having acne problems. I was teased about it as i am sure a lot of others are every day but that ends eventually. And no matter how terrible it is there is always someone out there who will look past it even when you cant and see how beautiful you really are.
Insomnia makes and artist of me Blurring the line between dream and reality Quiet visions dance before me With eyes to the ceiling Tracking lights from streets beyond as if streelights knew the answers to my dreams And as the silver lining falls From every cloud upon my roof I find solace in the music The pitter patter of my youth The rain It cleanses all unseen Sheds the worries from my dreams And slowly drifting off to sleep i find the world is quiet No demons lay in wait for me As i languish in my reverie But inches from the deepest sleep I jolt back to reality No peace of mind for me this night As once again my thoughts take flight So i imagine i have wings To make light of dreary things And with a sigh i lay and wait For insomnia to make an artist of me
I lost my way for a while. I became the sad, angry person I have tried for years to suppress. It’s funny. When I’m on top then I’m on top of the world. Nothing can bring me down. But when I’m down, I’m so far down that light no longer reaches me. The polarity of my emotional state is tiring. I realize through every shift in direction, every up and down, that one thing always brings me back.
ART. It’s as simple as that. Art will not judge you. It will not tell you that you are a terrible person. It will not yell at you, nor fight you. It will be there whenever you need it. It will lay forgotten for years but come back to you at a seconds notice. It is not confined to any one form. It will grow with you as you age. It will always be available. It will not forsake you.
I find that nothing heals like art. I write. I sing. I play. I create. I imagine. I perform. I dance. It has the ability to fill my heart with more love than I have ever received from any person. And I have left it several times. I have matured and thought I no longer needed it. But I will always need it more than I need a boyfriend or best friend. When I create I like myself and that’s the most important relationship you can have. A great loving one with yourself.